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i believe that would be the instance you were mentioning with the "sort of flat with a bit of copper sticking out" end. and the grey bits are the (rubber) cone washers?
in my image far above is what my supplies look like. they have what i believe you termed as a flared end (looks kinda like an acorn)
so it sounds like i just use the brass gland nut over the supply and i'm done? and you said hand tight then 1/4 turn more. but i've probably gone two full turns more and it still drips out the top of the nut where the threads are. i could try teflon tape but that's not supposed to be required, no?
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