Is this normal??

[CuriousGirl]

For a long time I always held the opinion that my living conditions weren't 'normal' for the neighborhood or standard of living in my area and demographic. Let me start out. I'm 20 years old, the daughter in the family. We bought our split entry house in 2001 and it was a big fixer upper, we spent the summer of 2001 tearing up carpeting, painting walls, tearing down walls and installing appliances. After we moved in towards the end of 2001 things in the basement level were left slightly unfinished but there were always 'big plans' for the basement. Fast forward 12 years and the house is still in disaray. Now things are starting to break down.

The central air was never repaired 10 years ago.
The downstairs toilet hasnt worked in a month.
There's bare drywall everywhere downstairs.
Leaking from the upstairs bathroom into the laundry room
Holes in the wall and open drywall in laundry room.
State of the art microwave stopped working so instead of repairing it we just bought a cheap new one.
Stove has slight gas leak and takes entirely too long to heat up
Freezer half of fridge cant hold a freeze in warmer months and even in cool months it defrosts itself everynight
Water/ice dispenser on fridge hasn't worked in 5 years.
Fridge wont stay cold and has odor.
Uneven water pressure and heat between two bathrooms
Bathtub fills up when you shower.
Basement is very moist and requires dehumidifier in summer
Garage filled with junk

My father is one of those mr fix it's ....or so he thinks? He can fix things and he has many times in the past . Recently he just leaves projects unfinished, things unfixed. Its frustrating that the house we put so much time money and sweat into is just reverting back to the terrible state we bought it in. We live in New Jersey in a 'upper middle class' town and a nice neighborhood. I've been in many houses in my area and NONE of them are in this state of disarray. I'm looking online to see if this state of a home is normal. I just don't think its normal for things to break and then not fix them? Am I complaining or are my concerns realistic?

[HayZee518]

repairs

owning a house comes with many responsibilities. maintenance being one of them. any appliance in your house is mechanical and doesn't come with a warranty that nothing will go wrong.
Air conditioners require filters, motors require oiling, a/c systems are essentially a closed loop of gas, but they do have joints that eventually leak.
heating systems require maintenance. oil pumps are supplied with close tolerances where the gear pump is located, wear is inevitable and will need replacing.
Water leaks while bothersome can be fixed. Earlier ABS plastics were brittle and should be replaced with pvc. Copper feed lines should last indefinitely but they do leak sometimes due to a faulty install from the start. pvc with shark bite connectors are the norm nowadays AND like electrical wires, you can snake them within wall cavities. Outside walls in a basement have special treatments because of the temperature differences between the inside and outside. vapor barriers play an important role in keeping moisture and mold at bay.

[Speedbump]

I can tell you that your conditions are not normal. Sounds like your Dad just gave up because he was overwhelmed with all the repairs. It's not encouraging when you have made a few repairs and installs that take a lot of time and money and by the time you get started on another, one of the first repairs needs more attention. After a while some people just say the hell with it.

I'm not trying to be insulting or degrading, but since you're 20 years old and still living with your folks, you could be helping out somehow? I'm not saying you don't. But if you are living there for free with no rent, not helping with the food bill, electric bill etc; you could be a big part of the problem. Back in the day, most kids moved out of the house shortly after graduating High School, got a job, went to College and supported themselves with very little help from their parents.

[mrcaptainbob]

Being whelmed.

Yeah, being whelmed, or even being overwhelmed is not good. Since many of these issues have been fixed at one point and have messed up since, maybe we can help. Glad you're here. You pretty much covered all of the subjects and topics in this forum. Pick one of them for a start and we'll help you through it. It's just a matter of chipping away at that mountain and we'll help you level it out....